Late last night, I couldn’t sleep. As I was processing some of what was going on in my life, I thought about the conversation Jesus had with a rich young man. At midnight I got up and started reading Matthew 19:16-28. I realized the young man wanted Jesus to tell him what “to do,” but Jesus was, in fact, inviting the young man into a whole new way of “being” not “doing”.
I find myself missing motherhood. In this role, I knew what I had to do…laundry, baking, making dinner at lunchtime because there would be no other time after school and even planning birthday parties. (Did you notice the list did not include cleaning?) Now, I am simply being a mother but from afar.
By one o’clock, I realized I was struggling with the fear of leaving the familiar. It seemed to me the rich young man knew how to be rich but wasn’t sure how to follow Jesus. I have to confess, I am more familiar with how “to mother” than how to be a mother. And if I am honest with myself, like the rich young man, I am more familiar with how to do the right and good things rather than how to be a true follower of Jesus.
Before I finally went to bed, I prayed…
Lord, thank you for graciously inviting me into a whole new way of “being.” Amen and amen.